Do you ever get pissed cause someone calls when you're using your phone? How dare you call when I'm online?
Unfortunately just because Joe unfriended satan doesn't mean they still don't jam. satan doesn't rock, but can twist a mean larynx. My ears are still bleeding.
Princess said, "Mom, also known as Party Pooper...." I walked in, so she never finished that sentence.
Just wait til her next birthday.
I'd give up my right to vote if I could stuff ballots up the asses of everyone who tells me how I should.
If you took Avandia and suffered death you may be entitled to compensation. But what are they gonna give you? A pillow? And wouldn't it have to relate to your affiliation? For a non-believer: A ticket to heaven? satan worshiper: A get out of hell free card? Christian? A bracelet for the rides? Atheist? Upgraded casket and vanilla scented embalming fluid? I should make Joe take Avandia just to be safe.
I heard chickens want to be legally cooked into domestic partnerships with Lettuce, Bacon, Grease and Tomatoes. They just want the same rights as burgers. I think if you don't like Chic-fil-A you shouldn't eat there and if you don't like gay marriage, have a sandwich and be real sure your fiance isn't gay.
Recently a nameless person texted this to me, "Stop being so damned depressed. Your kids don't need to see that. Grow up!! My best friend was beaten to death by her boyfriend 2 weeks ago, life is hard, but we can't dwell on it." Why the fuck didn't I think of that? I'll just stop it and grow up. Thanks. I needed to be reminded what a piece of shit mom I am. I feel so uplifted, but I gotta say if my best friend were beaten to death 2 weeks ago, I'd be dwellin.
Speaking of uplifting, do you ever think you're holdin it up but when you stand, realize part of your dress was in the toilet? I do it everyday. I could be on, "I didn't know I was peeing myself." Guess I need to stop it and grow up.
Mom, AKA, Party Pee-er
12 comments:
I probably need to grow up too....but no one has ever told me that! How rude!
She was saying it, Robyn, as a solution for depression. I have complex PTSD and no matter how old I get, it won't change the chemistry in my brain. Buy wtf about her best friend?
Is there seriously a show called “I Didn’t Know I Was Pregnant?” WTF?! What are they sleepwalking into men’s pants...LOL! And then think they're just gaining weight! Chickens should have the same rights as burgers, oh yes. I am with you on sandwiches and gay marriage! That text from the nameless person was just mean and rude! Her best friend was beaten to death and she can’t dwell?! She’s the one with the problem, not you. Dress in the toilet, done that too...LOL! One time at a mall restroom, I not only got the bottom of my dress in the toilet, when I turned around to check that out, one earring fell in the toilet and got immediately flushed down b/c it was one of those toilets that automatically flush when you get up!!
I had a neighbor who's daughter swore she didn't know she was pregnant...umm..okay...LOL...Wow, I'm sorry you had someone text you to just "grow up" and get over your depression. That sucks! I never put my skirt in a toilet but I did tuck it into my underwear one time.
Yeh Jersey, there is a show where the dum ass women plop out a baby and say they didn't know. Good one with the sleep walking into mens pants! Oh Jersey I feel your pain with the dress and earring! Seriously with that ladies best friend, I'd be doing some dwelling.
Elsie, My friend did that and then walked down the streets of New York. UGH
*blushing* are you sure that friend wasn't me? I was in NY in 7-11 LMAO
Damn, I didn't get the memo that we were suppose to grow up!
Have to tell you I have had five children and six pregnancies and I knew every single one of them. If your that dumb then I really don't think you should be allowed to keep the child, what if you don't realize it's a baby and think you have a puppy? Something to think about. This show always makes me laugh.
I have had to grow up more times then I could count because no matter what my depression returns at different times in my life so does that mean I grow up then grow back down and then grow back up again??
Depression isn't something you just grow out of SORRY so called friend you need some help because I sure as hell wouldn't just be ok with my friend being killed 2 years ago!!!
Life gets us down but we can overcome it and try to make it doable :] Not rosy & perfect but ok ".'
Janice it was 2 weeks, not 2 years! But you're right, I wouldn't be ok after 2 years, so maybe that's what you meant. Anyway, just wanted to tell you you make my days rosier and are an inspiration to us all.
Mama, Mama, Mama...
Holy shit, you must have started the diet.
See? Assholes are always gonna out themselves. One asshole down, 99 more to go!
I've shelved three of them already and darling, I feel fabulous.
Be gone, assholios.
Tina, Are they under glass on your shelf?
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