Parole and addict. Parole and addict. Go together like love and marriage. Gun and bullet. Me and Oprah. This I tell you mother, you won't make one, if you're the other. Before Christmas he was using heroin and stealin to support it. He stole 2 t shirts for the daughter of a friend. The cops chased him through a parking lot, into another mall and tackled him.
You can take a boy to jail, but ya can't make him think. A few weeks ago, I attended his revocation hearing. The judge revoked him. That means, since he broke parole, some of his time will be served back in prison. For those of you who bask in the craziness of missing crayons (you know who you are) this is how it goes: he got 6 years, 2 in, 4 on paper. He served time, got "good time," and was released on parole.
I'm not condoning shoplifting nor saying he didn't commit other offenses. Obviously the police believe he did or they wouldn't be searching my home. Usually I don't know what crimes he's committed until he gets arrested. Because if I do, I call the police.
However, he maybe the only felon on the cell block, if not in the history of criminals, who was ever in the penitentiary for Justin Beiber t shirts. That's right. My son's doin Beiber time.
He and Justin have seen better days. Justin broke up with his girl and his hamster died, but at least he still has his hat. Wonder whose dna is on it.
Justin's behavior's been so erratic, if my son woulda just waited, he probly coulda got em for free, I mean, legally.
I told him he better think of some other crime story cuz how do you think that prison conversation's gonna go?
What you in for?
Murder, you?
Armed robbery. What about you?
Hey you! White boi! What about you?
justin beiber
What'd you say?
Justin Beiber.
What?! Justin Beiber? You try to kill him?
No.
Sell him dope?
No.
Rob him?
No! I wanted to wear him, ok? I just wanted to wear him!
Boyfriend?
And that will be the way Justin Beiber turns my son into a violent offender. It will be self defense.
(c) copyright donna maysack 2013
google images
You can take a boy to jail, but ya can't make him think. A few weeks ago, I attended his revocation hearing. The judge revoked him. That means, since he broke parole, some of his time will be served back in prison. For those of you who bask in the craziness of missing crayons (you know who you are) this is how it goes: he got 6 years, 2 in, 4 on paper. He served time, got "good time," and was released on parole.
I'm not condoning shoplifting nor saying he didn't commit other offenses. Obviously the police believe he did or they wouldn't be searching my home. Usually I don't know what crimes he's committed until he gets arrested. Because if I do, I call the police.
However, he maybe the only felon on the cell block, if not in the history of criminals, who was ever in the penitentiary for Justin Beiber t shirts. That's right. My son's doin Beiber time.
He and Justin have seen better days. Justin broke up with his girl and his hamster died, but at least he still has his hat. Wonder whose dna is on it.
Justin's behavior's been so erratic, if my son woulda just waited, he probly coulda got em for free, I mean, legally.
I told him he better think of some other crime story cuz how do you think that prison conversation's gonna go?
What you in for?
Murder, you?
Armed robbery. What about you?
Hey you! White boi! What about you?
justin beiber
What'd you say?
Justin Beiber.
What?! Justin Beiber? You try to kill him?
No.
Sell him dope?
No.
Rob him?
No! I wanted to wear him, ok? I just wanted to wear him!
Boyfriend?
And that will be the way Justin Beiber turns my son into a violent offender. It will be self defense.
(c) copyright donna maysack 2013
google images
10 comments:
This should NOT be funny but goddammit, it is. See, I knew the Beibster was a bad influence.
Sorry that your son was revoked. I know you miss him like crazy. :(
Oh dear, he definitely shouldn't tell anyone that they were Bieber t shirts. Even One Direction would be better than that!
Kellie, I don't know what One Direction is, but it sounds better than In and Out.
Lily, He's been in jail so long, his prison stint will be short. It sucks cuz it's too far to visit, but he'll be home soon, How long can Beiber take? Just have to follow parole and not catch any new charges. The police are investigating him, so I hope that goes away instead of him.
But...but...they were MY crayons, and the damn kids lost 'em on me!
No, but seriously? That was sarcasm.
I'm sorry you're dealing with this shit, Donna. You and your kids are in my prayers. I admire the way you can find (or create) humor even in the hairiest of situations. If I were in your shoes, I'd be rocking back and forth in a padded room somewhere.
hahahahaha Kelly Ann You crack me up!! I'm missing some crayons outta my big box. And I think I'm gonna change that to a link cause you're rockin back and forth in a room somewhere!!!! Who do you think you're kddin???? Now what's on the menu. I want the microwave version.
I am truly sorry your son got revoked. Stealing is wrong but getting revoking for shoplifting Justin Beiber (can’t stand him!!) t-shirts?! “Doin’ Beiber time,” now that is just the ultimate wrong!! So not worth it. Oh yeah, that prison conversation would be priceless. It’s such a tough situation with your son and you have a rare ability to defuse it with humor. That’s not easy and you have my admiration!
You you have mine dear friend, Jersey.
I have no words.. We have *real* criminals roaming the streets and your son gets revoked. He's doing more time than those two pieces of shit that raped that girl and *that* is a crime! - You have my prayers always.. I don't know how you get thru it.. Such incredible strength..
Truly Mimi, If we were in a real city, he wouldn't have gone to jail for Justin.
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